Red Carpet Capitalism

Not all red carpet events are created equal. Some are great big, large, fancy events with bright lights and fancy stars. Others are events with bright lights. And so goes the premiere of "Capitalism: A Love Story," Michael Moore's newest project and indictment of the U.S. Financial system. Held at the new Alice Tully Hall at Lincoln Center, this particular event did not garner quite the hype that an actual Hollywood film or blockbuster might, and understandably so, but you never know. No big press check-in line, no long wait to get credentials, not even a scrum for a position on a the carpet. While this sounds all well in good for those of us eager to get a good soundbite or three, it also tends to translate into no big names showing up for a premiere. The stars who did show up, Chef Mario Batali, filmmaker Morgan Spurlock, and Michael Moore himself, made themselves available for sound bites. There was a Wallace Shawn sighting, yes, Wallace Shawn of the Princess Bride fame. I'm sure he's been in other things, but he will always be the guy from the Princess Bride. Hey Wallace, can we get a quick "Inconceivable?"

First up was Mario Batali, chef extra-ordinaire, and his orange crocs. Yes, that's right, he wears orange crocs. Nothing wrong with that, they are perfectly comfortable shoes, it's just amusing to see anyone on the red carpet wearing crocs, unless its fashion week - and then still amusing but understandable. But that's okay, let him wear his funny orange shoes, he's Mario Batali and he makes an amazing lasagna (so I hear). Next was Morgan Spurlock. Well, that's not entirely true, Wallace Shawn walked by - but Wallace Shawn did not seem in the best of moods, and we let him on his merry way (didn't really have anything to ask him, anyway). So Morgan "I like McDonald's" Spurlock was up next. He's a fellow documentary filmmaker, and one of those guys who likes to get dirty with his work, or at the very least eat crappy food for 30 days and see what happens. I want him to do a similar "Supersize Me" but with alcohol, I don't know what he'd do, except drink a lot and have a camera recording it. Maybe he would be obscene and profane and puke a lot, although that would make him Andy Dick. I'm just saying, it would be entertaining to me. Similar to that one episode of Kenny vs. Spenny on Comedy Central where they have a drinking contest but one of them gets non-alcoholic beer. Ha. Back to Morgan, the guy next to me asked him what he'd like to focus on next, and he said porn.

After Morgan there was a lull, and by lull I mean no one else was there. Michael Moore showed up early, but of course he has to give 30 minute sound bites to any and all reporters. Nice of him, but there are others waiting and we can't all be CBS Newswire, can we? So we waited, and we waited, and then I saw Christopher Meloni of Law and Order fame, and I think he was about to walk down the carpet, but he saw Michael Moore hogging the attention and he went inside. So we waited again, and Mr. Moore sloooowly made his way to the rest of us media peons, i.e. the radio and websites that don't have national acclaim yet. He finished talking to Yahoo! News and then was hurried away, but not before I got to ask him my very well thought out, educated, concise, inspiring, congenial question. I asked if he would run for public office. He chuckled, and said no. Fortunately I ran into him again at the after-party and got a more thoughtful answer, and his pick for the World Series.

So, on behalf of Michael Moore, go check out "Capitalism: A Love Story" in theaters this week.