Ocho-Sucko

Here's my problem: I don't like Chad Ochocinco. Ok, let me rephrase that, I don't like that his birth name is Chad Johnson and now his new name is Chad Ochocinco. No, his mother is not Mrs. Ochocinco, he is not a member of the Ochocinco clan, and he ain't Spanish, that's for sure. Mr. Ochocinco, as he is now known, is an eight-year veteran of the NFL and plays wideout for the Bengals of Cincinatti. Sure he's good, he's been to the playoffs, and yes, he is self-aggrandizing as many athletes are - but he changed his freaking name to something stupider than his original name, not that Johnson is a stupid last name, but at least its' a name, not a number.

The reason I hate this is that now people have to refer to him as Chad Ochocinco, he's listed in the NFL Directory as Ochocinco, reporters have to call him Mr. Ochocinco, when he calls up Verizon for assistance with his internet connection, the guy on the other end has to say 'and is there anything else we can assist you with today Mr. Ochocinco?" You see, it's just dumb, plain stupid. It's reminiscent of one-time XFL player Rod Smart - incidentally the XFL was a one-time pro football league, but that's another story. Anyway, Rod Smart had permission from the league to put 'He Hate Me' on the back of his jersey, you know, to ruffle the competion - which it did to an extent that all the competition was forced to return to its day jobs when the league folded.
My point being, that was stupid in 2001 - this is stupid in 2009.